I have always tried, when things look down, to subscribe to the Tinker Bell philosophy. You didn’t know she had a mantra?! Duh, “Think happy thoughts.” Obviously this doesn’t work every time, but it’ll get you through a bad day. I understand she’s a cartoon character, but I totally wanna be Tinker Bell when I grow up (yes I am aware of the irony there, “and we’re walking…”). She’s tiny, like me, cares passionately about her loved ones (I have a list of people I’d drink poison for), and doesn’t take but so much shit from people. My kinda girl… 🙂 So I have a running list I’d like to share with you all about being a single mom. Now, I feel like I can speak with great authority on this subject, not only because I am a single mom, but because I have also been a married mom, a stay-at-home mom, a working mom, a teen mom, and a cohabitating but not married mom. (don’t feel bad I’ve always been a bit of an overachiever lol) So this is a list (in no particular order) of reasons why, for ME and MY kids (emphasis is on purpose),being a single working mom is the greatest.
I decide what we have for supper. No one (who gets a vote) tells me “that’s not healthy enough” or, “what do you mean you’re too tired? What did you do today?” or my favorite “no, I’m just not in the mood for that”. Side note, I also get to decide when! 🙂
I choose haircuts & if I want my little boy to have longish hair, no one tells me no. Or if I want bangs, I’m not disappointing anyone.
I do not have to shave in the winter, unless I want to.
No one has more authority than I do in my house.
I don’t have to share the remote after 9pm… EVER
My parenting philosophy is LAW, no one to compromise with.
My house is as clean/dirty as I damn well want it to be.
If I want to blow money on something, I don’t have to discuss it with anyone.
I can leave clean laundry in a basket unfolded for weeks!
Merchants have to talk to me, not “don’t you want me to just explain it to your husband, dear?”
My bank account is the exact balance I left it at, always.
If I decide we should not get dressed all weekend and watch movies and eat pizza in the living room cause it’s raining, no one judges me.
There is no “I’m telling Dad”.
If I get the opportunity to move for a promotion there is no one else’s career to consider.
I don’t have to be nice to/pretend to like anyone’s lame, annoying friends. (Only my lame, annoying friends show up at my door. Love you guys, lol!)
My stuff is always where I left it and organised the way I want it to be.
I can decorate however the hell I want to. (there is a pink wall coming, I’ll tell you about that later lol)
I get to be proud of what I am doing with no qualifiers, it’s just me, and I AM doing it, thank you.
Single moms, got anything to add that’s awesome about being the Lady of the house? (if you are in charge you get capital letters 🙂 )
So here I am on a Saturday night doin’ my usual thing. Got off work, interacted with kids who were still awake and then sent them to bed, then started drinking (not a lot but am on my second) and reading some of my fav Mommy blogs. ( I don’t insert links here because I’m still not that sure on the legality of all that, but if you know feel free to comment, still learning & all) So I’m reading so funny stuff, some stuff that makes me feel compelled to comment, etc, when I get that look from the dog. That look probably means he needs to go out again so I start the process of conveying to him that I am willing (as the owner of the opposable thumbs) to take him out. Why is this a process? This dog (not mine) is over 14 years old, he can’t see anymore, maybe shapes, but he never did learn to communicate well enough to share what he can see with me. He also has seizures, everything from mild twitching to full on, Charlie’s (his name) not comin’ back from this one. He also now wears a sweater, he shivers without it, I mean shivers & looks at you with those accusing yet unseeing eyes for hours. Last night I wrestled his shivering body into his sweater, he didn’t bite me, I assume this is an improvement in our relationship as I have never really liked this dog nor he like me. (there was an incident regarding shoe homicide when I was 17 that I have never forgiven him for) Anyway, where was I? Oh yes, he’s also deaf, you could scream/shout/etc in this dog’s face, not even a flinch. Why on earth, you ask, would I scream in a dog’s face?! I happen to love dogs, hope to one day (when it would be more fiscally responsible) be a proud doggie mommy. This dog pees. So all dogs pee, this one is incontinent. He will walk around a room & pee the entire time, on your foot, on your groceries (ewwwww!), on whatever is in his path. So yeah, everyone in this house has screamed the words “Charlie! Stop!” to no avail. He also has skin lumps & tags all over, along with age spots that show up very clearly when he gets a haircut. (this has got to be one of the most unattractive/irritating/yet pitiful dogs on the planet) So back to my happening Saturday night with the internet. Every 20 to 30 minutes I get stared at with those unseeing eyes, & hop up (cause cleaning up the pee will definitely cramp my night as I am wearing footie pjs & once again, ewww). Then I have to move down the stairs to let him out, except he can’t see that’s what I’m doing. So here I am in my bright red footies stomping on the floor (so he will notice the vibrations) & saying things like, “come on. Let’s go. HEY! CHARLIE! Over here!” Did I mention the little get-Charlie’s-attention-by jumping up and-down-like-a nutcase dance I’m doing? That’s right I’m doing a more involved entice-you-to-go-potty-dance than I ever did for my kids. For the dog. The dog I don’t like. *sigh* Then we get down the stairs & I get him outside. Victory! I let him back in, brr it really is cold tonight, and we go back upstairs. I back to my internet trolling, he back to laying in front of the heating vent in the kitchen. And then about 20 minutes later? The same thing. Lol
Have you ever cared for an elderly pet? Tell me about it. (Or just get it off your chest-I know I feel better)